Dear Stomach

Happy stomach is happy.

So after yesterday’s rather annoying acid reflux flare up, I made a point of being extra cautious with what I ate and drank today. I also made sure that I monitored very closely the quantity of food that I put into my food-hole1.

I started the morning off as usual, getting up at 5:30 and going about my daily ritual – beginning of course with breakfast – first Elliot’s, then mine. Except today, instead of having a piping hot cup of coffee with my oatmeal soup2, I opted for a glass of almond and coconut milk. Just as delicious, not nearly as caffeine-y. That seemed to go well. My stomach remained happy, and not hurt-y. And for those of you not in the know, hurt-y is not the way you want your stomach to be.

I followed up breakfast with a bottle of water, thinking that maybe dehydration may have played into the reflux issue. To be honest, I have no idea if this is the case, or if dehydration could influence reflux, but I figured more water couldn’t hurt.

Aside: I just asked the almighty Google, and apparently dehydration can cause acid reflux. Weird. Why is this the first I’ve heard of this?

Successful consumption of breakfast and water made me bold. Perhaps too bold, but life is full of risks and I figured Why not go for it? Of course, I meant coffee. Me being me, I headed to Starbucks and picked up a tall coffee. The first sip was delicious, but fearing that I might anger the demon in my stomach, I chose to drink it very slowly. Specifically, I nursed it over the course of about 4 or 5 hours.

Mmmm, coffee.

Fortunately, nothing happened.

And nothing continued to happen during my dinner5. Nor did anything happen during my bike ride. Nor did anything happen when I had a snack of berries and granola.

So I sit here this eve, very happy that the acid reflux seems to have returned to the corner of hell from whence it came, but also perplexed.

What was so different about yesterday that made me want to punch my stomach square in the face? Did I eat too much5? Did I eat the wrong type of food? Or was it really a case of dehydration?

Whatever the reason, I’m going to continue to monitor my food intake. I think I’m also going to try to up my water intake again.

And if that doesn’t work, be warned dear stomach – I’m gonna punch you right in the face.


1 Also known as my gob, my pie-hole, my word-hole, or the place where I occasionally store my foot.

2 I call it oatmeal soup3 because it is not nearly thick enough to be classified as true porridge4. Regardless, I find it quite delicious (and filling).

3 Recipe: combine ~1/3 cup of oats, with ~1/2 tbsp shaved dried coconut (unsweetened), ~1 tbsp raw peanut butter, ~1 tbsp raw honey, ~1/3 cup granola in a standard cereal bowl. Fill with boiling water to the lip of the bowl. Let stand for a few minutes. Eat. Enjoy. Variants: fruit, raisins, almonds, etc., may also be added in place of, or in addition to the shaved coconut.

4 If I were to make it as thick as traditional porridge, I’d have a very difficult time being able to eat it without incurring some sort of acid reflux.

5 This had better not be the issue, because I really can’t afford to eat less.


2 thoughts on “Dear Stomach”

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